For those who missed the text exchange between Strider and William, I'm posting here. This isn't in The Darkest Craving, but happened behind the scenes somewhere in the first 100 pages!
William: I know. Disaster has finally flipped his lid
Strider: Try 2 talk him in2 stayin w/us
William: Did. Epic fail
Strider: When you say “did” do U mean “didn’t”
William: U know me so well
William: Why don’t U try 2 talk 2 him?? by U I mean U
Strider: I like my balls where they R, thanks tho
William: If he leaves fortress 2 find this chick, he’s gonna get shanked—NOT in good way
Strider: There’s a good way?
William: Hells yeah. There was this one time, at band camp…
Strider: Blow me.
William: Told U be4 UR not hot ‘nuff 4 me.
Strider: Please. U want a piece of me SO bad
William: I’ve seen better
Strider: LIES! No one’s seen better. So what R we gonna do about Kane?
William: I’m sick & tired of looking this good AND saving the day. But fine. Whateves. I’ll go w/him & make sure chick’s not cray-cray. But U’ll owe me SO BIG
Strider: UR all heart—such a giver. I’d go but the old ball & chain has
Strider: I’d go but MY WONDERFUL GLORIOUS CONSORT HAS GENTLY REQUESTED THAT I STAY AND HELP WITH A VERY IMPORTANT TASK
William: UR wonderful glorious consort just stole UR phone, didn’t she?
Strider: Hello, Willy
William: Hello, Kaia. Tell the Stride-Man not 2 worry—I’m on the case
Strider: Poor Kane. Poor world
William: Well, look @ that. U know me as well as the Stride-Man. Save a kiss 4 me. I like a lot of tongue.
Strider: What U’ll get is a lot of fang—across UR carotid
William: Don’t you dare save a kiss 4 me. How does Strider live w/U?
Strider: Easy. He’d die w/out me
William: That kinda sick obsession is NEVER happening 2 me! Willy signing off.